part two: how do you say thank you?

 Aurora, IL - May 2009 (Photo by Liz Ahlberg)

Part 1

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While I was sitting amongst my friends, in an amphitheater filled with many other people I didn't know, something new was taking place within my heart. During the Barlow Girl set, one of the girls began to pray, and something started moving within me. I really and truly felt the presence of God more in my life than I ever had before. I felt God nudging me to trust Him with my whole life. With all of my decisions, all of my worries, all of my victories. Everything. So I did. Just there in my seat, it was a silent and personal offering of my life, but I promised and knew that my life would never be the same. 

After the Barlow Girl's played we all settled in our seats and prepared for David Crowder Band and Third Day to take the stage. The long day in the Florida November sun was taking its toll on all of us, and we were starting to feel the results of the many hours of walking and taking in good music. With achy feet we listened and cheered to the rest of the music. As I sat there, I had to wonder how many other people's lives were being changed on that very night. What was going through other people's minds? Were they just there for a good concert? Had they gone because all their friends were doing it, but God swooped in and did something radical within their hearts when they least expected it? Either way, I knew that I was one of the latter, and was left wondering what my life would become and where God would take me.

Later that night, once I got home, I went to bed with a smile on my face and memories floating through my mind as I drifted off to sleep. I awoke the next morning with that song about rock stars needing money in my head. I was walking around my house humming it, along with another song by those guys from Canada. Something about little being much when God is in it. I liked that song a lot and felt as thought is resonated perfectly with the things that were going on in my life. 

I went to Wayfest only wanting to see Barlow Girl and nothing else, but I left with a new heart and a new band to fall in love with. The morning after Wayfest, I logged onto my Myspace page and immediately sent downhere a friend request. I added one of their songs to be my back ground music on my page, and began searching to find every little bit of information I could about them. I burned a CD with downhere's songs from their most recent album, Wide-Eyed and Mystified, and a mixture of my favorite Barlow Girl songs. It was like I was taking a little bit of Wayfest with me where ever I went, reminding me of the emotion and change that took place that night.

The year or so before this point was really rough for my family. One of my brothers was diagnosed with a rare lung disease that should have been found when he was an infant, but it wasn't found until he was 18 years old. Before he was diagnosed, it took months and months and many doctors appointments and hospital stays until the doctors finally figured out what was wrong. My brothers surgery was scheduled for the weekend after Wayfest at Shands at University of Florida. This was a major surgery that would involve removing the upper left lobe of his left lung. 

It was during my scouring of the web that I stumbled upon downhere's message boards. I shyly posted a prayer request for my brothers surgery on there, and was amazed at the amount of people I didn't even know who so generously poured out their prayers upon my family. The body of Christ...brothers and sisters. I left home with my mom, brother, and his girlfriend. I felt completely hollow inside. My heart was broken. I took that burned CD with me and listened and listened and silently cried. I covered up my tears by pretending my eyes were itchy. I didn't want anyone to know how nervous I was for my brother and his surgery and whether he would be okay. While it wasn't a surgery that was as risky as open heart surgery, there was still the risk of something going wrong. We drove up to Gainesville a day early because my brothers surgery was early the next morning. My dad, step-dad (then my mom's boyfriend), and grandparents drove up the next morning to join us in the waiting room for the day. My brothers surgery was completely successful, but he had a long road to recovery. My step-dad, brothers girlfriend and I left that night to head back home. It was tough, knowing that we were leaving my mom and brother. I knew how difficult it had been for my mom, and it was hard for me to leave, knowing that she had to do this on her own. 

My brother was in the hospital for about a week with my mom, which meant I was at home by myself all day until my step-dad came home. I'd try and do my school work, but my mind would wander elsewhere. I found myself on downhere's message boards a lot, and the encouraging words that were offered to me, knowing that people were praying for me, the community that was in this place, it was what I needed just then. It was what got me through when I felt so alone.

Community.

to be continued...